Hulk vs. Silver Surfer: Our Greatest Thread Ever

 

We’re not kidding.  Thanks to the the WordPress Blogging Technology that creates your Daily Miltonian, we know for a fact that ever day, at least once but usually more than once, someone on the Internet does a Google search for Hulk vs. Silver Surfer, and they tend to find our post, made one year ago.  The majority of the random traffic the DM enjoys is because of this endless search, this urge to know, not Would Hulk Beat Silver Surfer, or Silver Surfer Defeats Hulk — no one searches these things.  No.  All people want is the match itself.  Hulk.  Versus.  Silver Surfer. Here are the past years worth of comments on said post.  As always, we encourage you:  keep ’em coming. The fight has only just begun. 

  • 1. Warfield  |  April 9, 2007 at 12:45 pm

    Ya’ see – the issue gets complicated when you look at the different incarnations of the hulk and the silver surfer. Let’s say we’re ignoring the “”Ultimate” versions of both of these characters (the Ultimate Galactus storyline by Warren Ellis is fracking AMAZING but it downgrades the Silver Surfer severely so we’re ignoring it). That simplifies things a bit, but we still have to deal with whether we’re talking about stupid hulk (Banner mind suppresed) or smart hulk (Banner mind present). Let’s assume b/c they’re fighting that it’s big ol’ dumb hulk who crushes first and asks questions, well… never.Here’s the deal – the Hulk is well-neigh unstoppable. You could probably kill him by: 1) feeding him a nuke for breakfast or 2)using Wolverine’s Adamantium claws (or any Adamantium weapon) and, with massive force, cutting off his head or removign vital organs. But hey now, this is a MARVEL battle – no one should get eviscerated like that (espesh not an icon). So it’s all about incapacitation. In this case, the Silver Surfer wins. Here’s why: he can travel through f***ing SPACE, dude. All he has to do is body check or yank the Hulk out into space and the hulk is outta’ the fight. Right?Edit Comment

  • 2. WILD AL  |  April 9, 2007 at 3:46 pm

    The Hulk in contrast to other superheroes might be more powerful and stronger, but that doesnt hold a stick to the insane speed and power of the Silver Surfer. The dude travels close to the speed of light? Which is is approximately 186,282.397 miles per second! Thats incomprehensible to me! This guy is faster then Santa Claus on Christmas eve! Now Im sure it would not be the Silver Surfers intention to kill the Hulk! Which he could! The bro has has the power of the universe at his command! All sorts of cosmic shit! Fuck gamma bombs, the dude could tap into Solar Energy Alone and Destroy Thor, The Thing, Dr Strange, Iron Man, and the Hulk Together. But why would he? Forget Having to toss Hulk into Outerspace that would be a waste of time for Norrin. All he would have to do is unleash just a small tad bit of all that cosmic space voodo cryptic power he has, even just in a mere fraction of a second before the Hulk attempts to even think about doing anything, and the Silver Surfer could have been to MENOMONIE, Wisconsin Grabbed a juicy fat sizzling hamburger with our boy Julian, made a quickstop in Portland knock down a few pints of beer with Erik at the Crow Bar, Dropped off some early wedding presents for the Bones back in Philly, and then said fuck it let me pick up Wild Al in Brooklyn and take him out for a quick jaunt out to Ohio For some of those dangerously delicious dope ass Cheese Dogs I saw posted last month on this page, then gone back to meet up for the fight, even before the Hulk knew what happened.

    All of this without having to use one of those crazy ass Cosmic Power Punches he throws.

    Thats just my take on things.

    I dont know, You know.

    Edit Comment

  • 3. Alex  |  April 9, 2007 at 4:01 pm

    Wild Al, I’m gonna cut yo out of one of those old ass phoots from Bader’s Philly retrospective and add yo to the banner tonight.

    Edit Comment

  • 4. WILD AL  |  April 9, 2007 at 4:12 pm

    thats awesome Alex ill send you a more recent pic. hows myspace sound?

    Edit Comment

  • 5. Alex  |  April 9, 2007 at 4:33 pm

    Sure man.

    Edit Comment

  • 6. dailymiltonian  |  April 9, 2007 at 8:22 pm

    We really do need our own message board. This stuff is awesome.

    Edit Comment

  • 7. BradyDale  |  April 11, 2007 at 8:42 pm

    Surfer wins. See first post. Erik knows my take on this. he can drop him in space and leave. And as I told Bader before… the Rhino once charged the Surfer and the Surfer stopped him with ONE HAND. I don’t think he’d even have to go into space. The guy is just wicked powerful.

    In other news… he’s faster than light. Remember when he went and got Reed Richards to take him to Galactus’s side because the big G needed a doctor? Just one fantabulous instance of the Surfer in hyperspace.

    Edit Comment

  • 8. Dustbuster  |  April 16, 2007 at 7:45 am

    The Hulk’s only chance is to keep the battle in an atmosphere, and to get mad until he gets strong enough to do damage to Surf. Since no being in the universe is immune to physical damage say under Eternity, then the Surfer can be beat. I am sure that The Hulk could do it. But likely not alone. On a strength level, the Hulk can surpass the Surfer for sure. The Hulk was able to go toe to toe with Thanos. The only problem might be the energy blasts. He is missing the speed it would take to avoid them all. If the Hulk were somehow lent some sort of energy damage resistance armor which was flexible enough not to resuce his movement speed, then the Hulk rules on his strength! Fun ideas for fights!

    Edit Comment

  • 9. Dustbuster  |  April 16, 2007 at 8:19 am

    Great picture by the way.

    Edit Comment

  • 10. Newsweek  |  April 25, 2007 at 12:58 am

    Surfer wins no problem. Even if hulk did have the resistant armour that doesnt affect his speed, he still isnt fast enough to stop him. The kind of speed that the Silver Surfer has (which as said before is close to light speed) then strength is no matter. If he was travelling that fast and head butted The Hulk he’d go flying into space. The Hulk is slow, dimwitted and although strong, no match against the Silver Surfer.

    Edit Comment

  • 11. Jak  |  May 1, 2007 at 9:38 pm

    Power………Cosmic………..

    Edit Comment

  • 12. Never  |  May 4, 2007 at 6:11 am

    The Power Cosmic matters not; Surfer is a pacifist. He’s lost fights to inferior opponents before.

    Regardless, one facet of The Power Cosmic is the ability to absorb nigh any form of energy. If I recall correctly he’s absorbed Hulk’s gamma radiation before, forcing him to revert to Banner. Hulk #250.

    Incorrect Warfield, gutting Hulk would not work. Vector of the U-Foes tried that (everything save mere bone and tendon). Hulk simply regenerated it.

    http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b36/kentroy/hulk397-3.jpghttp://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b36/kentroy/hulk397-4.jpghttp://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b36/kentroy/hulk397-5.jpg

    Hulk has survived point blank nukes.

    Hulk has survived in deep space. He’s JUMPED into orbit before.

    So what he’s faster than light. HOw often has he USED that in a fight? Hardly ever. Gladiator is able to fly pretty damn quickly and Hulk absolutely destroyed him.

    Edit Comment

  • 13. nick  |  October 19, 2007 at 7:24 am

    hulk would win because he can’t die. He has unlimited power and he would kick silver surfers ass

    Edit Comment

  • 14. jimmy  |  November 6, 2007 at 5:26 pm

    ur quers u fight over this stuff by the way would win lugia from pokemon or enite from pokemon

    Edit Comment

  • 15. keith  |  November 10, 2007 at 6:42 pm

    In a street fight, like the one when chromedome had the obedience slug on “Saakar”, and it’s brute strength against brute strength-Hulk wins. Gloves off-Chrome Dome wins.

    Edit Comment

  • 16. jimmy  |  December 12, 2007 at 1:18 pm

    Silver surfer totally because light speed DUH and the Hulk can only go below Mach 1.

    Edit Comment

  • 17. jimmy  |  December 12, 2007 at 1:21 pm

    Hulk SUCKS So does pokemon JIMMY!

    Edit Comment

  • 18. Tom  |  December 12, 2007 at 1:48 pm

    Silversurfer ia awesome so what if the hulk can heal he cant breath in space.Also Silversurfer can turn him into inside out dude.F*%k yah dude.

    Edit Comment

  • 19. Tom  |  December 12, 2007 at 2:50 pm

    what about Silversurfer against superman? most likely Silversurfer huh?

    Edit Comment

  • 20. Dark Lord  |  February 27, 2008 at 9:19 pm

    well, the silver surfer would probably win. if SS could fly the hulk into the sun or maybe drop him off in a black hole, he’d be toast. SS is impenitrable! invulnerable to anything and that includes the hulk’s fists. SS could also suck the gamma radiation away from hulk, thus rendering him open to a blast to the face. OR he could just turn the hulk into a snail using his ability to manipulate atoms and DNA. GOGO SS!!

 

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