The Great Miltonian Debate Club: Why Are Girls So Messy?

Or rather, why are girls actually messier than guys.  Hear me out now, people, it’s like this: when we were young lads growing up in a younger America, we all knew one thing was true about girls: they were cleaner. They had cleaner clothes (not as much mud and bubblegum or oatmeal on their gear) and they had cleaner rooms. Boys, on the other hand, had very messy rooms, with clothes everywhere, baseball cards thrown askew and G.I. Joes with missing weapons or even heads. Plus the occasional stray Fruit Roll-Up wrapper or a piece of Bazooka Joe that someone forgot to chew. Boys were messier.

We’ve been discussing this lately, here in our new Offices. We’ve been discussing the fact that no matter who you ask this question to —

The Question: When is the last time you knew a girl (or woman) who had a really, you know like really clean room?

— that the answer is always, always:

“Woah, like not in a really, like really long time.”

I mean what’s going on here, people? Is it a recent, historic thing? That otherwise sensible women suddenly became messier and normally careless dudes somehow became neat-freaks? Yes we could go into the often-unfortunate actual “facts” of history, y’know, the whole women with their so-called “natural homemaking” skills blah blah BUT WE WON’T, BECAUSE THE DAILY MILTIONIAN ISN’T INTO THAT KIND OF STUFF. No, we just want to know why your female friends (and you, our female readers) have such messy rooms, and why boys are all of a sudden much neater and tidier.

Keep all Post-Feminist/Marxist/Theorist/Misogynist/Whateverist rah-rah boo-hiss rhetoric out of this discussion. This is supposed to be Fun.

See you in the comments section!

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6 thoughts on “The Great Miltonian Debate Club: Why Are Girls So Messy?

  1. i can’t say that i necessarily agree. maybe gals are messy in a more stuff on the floor kind of way but still i think that dudes are messier in a grimy kind of way i.e. dishes in bed or caked on eggs on the stove and beard hair on the sink and shit like that. they have ladies beat in the grimy department.

  2. Yes, I have noticed this also. Maybe girls are rebelling against homemaker sterotypes by having super duper messy rooms. Maybe reacting against their childhood ways. Maybe they less worried about messy rooms because they know their hearts are pure. Guys on the other hand are reacting against their baseball card days by proving how clean they can be. (Also, their hearts are unclean.) I predict that by the time we are all geezers that the switch will take place again. Boys will be messy geezers and girls will be neat ones. Just a theory folks.

  3. I’d just like to thank a certain female poster above who wasn’t referencing me w/r/t beard hair in the sink and/or dishes in my bed… BED! I would never do such things (not in many years, anyway). Before living in my current dreamhome – I have lived with a few of the foulest roommates imaginable… and here’s the kicker: they were boys AND girls! Tthat’s the thing… they were neither MEN nor WOMEN – because men and women pick up after themselves to at least a semi-reasonable degree. That’s what we’re talking about here… not gender but maturity!

  4. I’m a secret slob in a way that melds seamlessly with my bohemian decorating/ lifestyle sensibilities. Things (paper things, yarn things, sentimental nostalgia things) adorn my apartment in neat little piles. Maybe it’s the same instinct that keeps us ladies safe from the fear of asking for driving directions – we have internalized our role as ‘object’, and as such require guidance and direction.

  5. Usually my room is messy when I am in University and don’t have the time to clean it. When I was an undergrad I was a total slob, but when I graduated and got job my room was the pinnacle of cleanliness. Now I am back in school working on my masters degree and my room is a mess again. So based on my experience, I think it’s a time thing.

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