When We Leave It Will Be Cold Outside


The Big Storm of ’03, that’s J-Lou, aka J-Crew, aka J-Clue, aka the Fang, impromptu sledding with what seemed like hundreds of Philly U girls, up on Raven Hill, in scenic East Falls, aka Fort Saint Davids, which (full reveal) was the original name the settlers gave the place and where me and Bones got the name for our Project/Divinely Motivated Style.

Bones might be able to tell the whole story better, as he’s pretty much the Ishmael whose mind survived to tell the tale when the ship of our sanity got smashed to bits by the White Whale of the snowstorm. Both Bones and Wild Al were hanging out at the hundred-year old East Falls house where I lived with Big E when the storm hit, and thanks to typical Regional Rail problems they both got stuck out there with us for days. Madness quickly ensued, broken only by occasional whiskey breaks at the Gun Boat and, of course, sledding. At one point Wild Al tried to walk back to Center City, only to arrive back dejected at midnight, and Big E chased me down the steps and dumped a bin of laundry on my head. J-Lou, who was our neighbor at the time, sledded as much as possible. You do what you got to do.


First and last performance of Kitchen, in a kitchen. Our whole M.O. was to only perform in kitchens. This was the only kitchen that was gracious enough to have us. Everyone else thought it was too weird, having Kitchen perform in their kitchen, so we broke up shortly thereafter. Ce la vie. It could have been a brilliant career.


Big E and Mallory aka MalPal, giving his own Kitchen performance in the kitchen of our aforementioned East Falls house. Right here Big E is demonstrating “Guitar Sex Moves”, which we felt was a problem in the Circa 2002 Philly Rock Scene. Things had gone from Cool to Creepy, and frankly we were all a little disturbed by the trend. You can fuck after the show, you don’t have to start on the guitar. MalPal thought it was funny, but you cannot tell from her expression.


I am a scientist – I seek to understand me
All of my impurities and evils yet unknown
I am a journalist – I write to you to show you
I am an incurable
And nothing else behaves like me

And I know whats right
But I’m losing sight
Of the clues for which I search and choose
To abuse
To just unlock my mind
Yeah, and just unlock my mind

I am a pharmacist
Prescriptions I will fill you
Potions, pills and medicines
To ease your painful lives
I am a lost soul
I shoot myself with rock & roll
The hole I dig is bottomless
But nothing else can set me free

And I know whats right
But I’m losing sight
Of the clues for which I search and choose
To abuse
To just unlock my mind
Yeah, and just unlock my mind

I am a scientist – I seek to understand me
I am an incurable and nothing else behaves like me

Everything is right
Everything works out right
Everything fades from sight
Because thats alright with me

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3 thoughts on “When We Leave It Will Be Cold Outside

  1. I think these posts go to show how we all need to trade in our digital cameras for Polaroids, a stack of film and a scanner. Oh the warmth! Screw the lack of snow and a good snow hill in Philly this year. How can I be the only one commenting on all of this?

  2. That blizzard in ’03 was insane. Big E, Bader, and I were at the Dahlek of Hate looking for JCG, the Animation, and the Dahlek Hate girl. There were rumors of a party going down at Karen Kinney’s house but then someone came into the bar saying it was really coming down out there. We had all heard the weather reports but didn’t think we’d see Septa shut down or anything like that. So we leave the bar early because Wild Al is just sitting back at the house in East Falls by himself with a bunch of soolic. After like a foot of snow lands by 2 am, I got the news from Bader that he was definitely not driving me back to my apartment in Center City so I may as well crash there. I called my ex (whom I was still living with) and she said that it was better that way, because she had a date that night and brought the guy over. It was cool because we were having a great time and the completely forgone madness had not set in yet. The next night, once Wild Al left the first time to hike like 13 miles in three feet of snow, Big E threw Bader’s laundry down the steps for “jamming” on “Box Full of Memories” with him through his bedroom wall, and I just sat there mulling over some dude reaming my ex out raw dog on the bed I should’ve been sleeping in, the Darkness really set in. There wasn’t a soul in that house who didn’t come close to losing their minds. I think Bader managed to stay closest to sane.

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